Ramblings of a FTWM

There gone my 2 weeks of annual leave. Thinking of having to go back to work tomorrow really make me sick, but I can never get really sick enough to warrant for a medical leave. I wonder why some people could love their job or employer so much until they look forward to working the next day. I am not saying that I am working for a lousy employer.  I have an employer that pays me well with above average benefits.  He gave me fair increment and good bonuses so far for the last 4 years. Well of course that was also because I am a good performer each year. 

Wrong job? Nope. I graduated and work in this field for the past 10 years. No regret.

I guess it is the people that I am working with. They think that I am the most important person who holds all the information where nobody else can access.  It is as though in their directory, they only see my contact number but no one else. I can hardly take a day off without receiving calls from the office. You see, certain things can be delayed until I am back. Certain puzzle can be solved if they independantly take the initiative to find out how. Certain reports can be requested from me earlier without waiting till the final minute. I have to sacrifice my sleep just to be early in the office to get the last minute request done. At times, I have to stay up in the office to after 8pm for meetings/discussions. All these frustrated me. But being a responsible employee, I still obey and get those things done.

I can’t accomodate to these so flexiblely nowadays compared to years ago because I have a husband who is waiting to kiss me goodbye before he leaves for night shift work and a son at home who is waiting to call me “Mommy”. Soon I will have a baby waiting to suckle my engorged breast. Where is the work-life balanced?

I told my mom recently of my intention to leave after I’ve delivered, either to be a SAHM or find a less stressful and time consuming job like a receptionist or clerk. She, knowing the amount of bonuses I received each year, with her dollar sign eye ball, says, “Are you sure you want to leave and for-go the many months bonus you can receive?”

Sigh…it’s all about money. Why should there be an existence of money in human life which then created so much problems…crime, theft, bribery. How or where can I find peace and happiness at the work place?

This entry was posted on Sunday, January 3rd, 2010 at 3:30 am and is filed under Unrelated. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.


  1. Merryn says:


    Switching from what you are doing now to a receptionist or clerk won’t do you much good. The working hours are basically much similar except maybe an hour or two lesser. You might find yourself ‘rotting’ there at the reception table too.

    What you may want to do is, switch line altogether. Something with much more flexibility and accommodates your kids’ well being. Teaching perhaps? Short hours and Jonathan may even be there with you…

    Whatever it is, I hope you’ll find that right balance in your life 🙂

    ... on July January 3rd, 2010
  2. rachel says:

    Tell me about it…:(

    It’s a choice we make. Money will never be enough. Workload will be never ending. I would suggest that you pray about it and see where does God lead you too.. Hope you will find an answer and be at peace..

    ... on July January 3rd, 2010
  3. MieVee @ MummysReviews.com says:

    Or consider being a WAHM?
    With your knowledge in your field, is there a niche market you can serve by producing consultancy work, publishing books, etc.?
    I’m happy being a SAHM now to my 10-month old boy, and am working towards having a small business for work satisfaction and generate passive income.
    Try exploring and you may hit an idea.
    There must be a way to earn income and be happy at the same time.
    Good luck! 🙂

    ... on July January 3rd, 2010
  4. andrewjune says:

    i know…the stress, the feeling of having to work and missing the loved ones at home…been there, done that…

    i hope you try to find a balance btw them…it’s great to do what you like and to find the satisfaction of being the successful employee and also to find the satisfaction of becoming a mum…it’s never easy, and it will never…
    but it’s part & parcel of life…

    i know you can find the best solution to this…:)

    ... on July January 4th, 2010
  5. Ann says:

    LOL….I was feeling irritable this morning as well!!!

    It doesn’t help that you are pregnant and that your body may ache and that you are not feeling in top form!

    Hang in there.

    When the baby is born and things get back into routine and you get back into your fit form, maybe the work won’t seem so bad!

    But if it still does, then go where God leads. Parents always want us to earn enough…it’s the old school to earn as much and save more!

    ... on July January 5th, 2010
  6. Pet says:

    Maybe you just need a break or change Take a breather and think what you want to do. I have a friend who did exactly this, take a few months off then only decide whether it is what U really wants. Now, she is back to work for another company.

    ... on July January 5th, 2010
  7. Adino says:

    Perhaps you can find an assistant at your job, so you can delegate some of your tasks. Perhaps see if there are any ways to allow your colleagues to ‘self service’ using online reports or enhanced system.

    Maybe your department can come out with some sort of FAQ or guide documentation so your colleagues can help themselves first before looking for you.

    I think this will affect not only your personal time, but in the long term may affect your career. You will be too busy doing all this work, but have no time to look upwards. You can’t do work that will bring true value to company profits, and ultimately you suffer in your promotions.

    ... on July January 6th, 2010
  8. debbie says:

    i can truly understand how you feel. Other than the job responsibilities, the worries/concern on the little one always pop up although you are busy like hell.

    Yeah, i’m also having the thot of quiting my current job. sighh…

    ... on July January 7th, 2010
  9. lil prince's mum says:

    agreed.. money is important…

    ... on July March 4th, 2010

Post a Comment